What if there were an immortality pill. Would you take it?
It would halt your growth at your current age, remove all health issues and you would stay that way forever (or maybe until someone cut off your head, I haven’t really thought this all the way through). Oh, and one more thing. You only have one minute to decide. What would you do?
Did you take it?
Well, let’s consider some of the unintended consequences if you did choose to swallow:
1) Alimony – enough said (because you know she’ll be popping that pill as soon as you do).
2) You’ll have to deal with moving, and, no, not to a new house or apartment. I’m talking a few billion years from now when the sun expands to envelope the earth, and we have to find a new place to live. You thought moving across town was a pain…
3) If you have a gambling addiction, let me offer a little advice – you’re never going to get ahead, no matter how long you try.
4) Marriage – just like #1, she’ll be popping that pill, too. Hopefully, you’ll want her to join you in the forever after (’til death us do part won’t really apply anymore). However, that cute little sound she makes when she chews, after a few thousands years, it’s going to get really annoying.
5) Regarding #4, get ready for separate bedrooms (if you’re not already there). Your snoring will have her wanting to kill you (that is, if chopping the head off applies).
6) “Been there, done that” will take on a whole new meaning.
7) How’s that pension?
8) On the positive side, it will influence your willingness to work on your relationship.
9) Imagine that long car trip you took with your parents where you constantly asked “are we there yet?” Well, now imagine them always and forever saying “no”. That’s kind of how it will be.
and 10) She’ll never ever let you forget the time when you…
Having second thoughts?
Also feel free to add to the list. It’s best that we’re fully prepared.
Until next time – Don’t Look Down
by William Darrah Whitaker
6 thoughts on “Immortality – Ten Reasons to Think Twice”
Good job and very clever (as always)!
And, the old jokes really are the best, aren’t they? LOL…
The only real drawback I can see is that living with an incurable disease would really suck.
And, don’t forget, you’ll never ever be able to get away from those obnoxious mattress commercials
Times are tough when you need a guillotine to commit suicide!
Of course, a sharp meat cleaver and a good friend would probably do in a pinch
Or a good enemy 🙂